Bittersweet

Bittersweet, these memories of love
I hold so dear. Tears come to blur
the clarity of splendid autumn skies, as
I realize again that all the many questions
of the why remain unanswered.

Perhaps an answer simply wasn't meant
to come to me. Yet now, somehow, I
feel you flying free in ways you never
could before. I sleep a lot these days,
for always in my dreams I seem to feel
an interplay with all the newborn freedom
that your spirit feels.

I wake too slowly, for the feel of bittersweet
comes then - knowing that I'll never feel the
warmth of you awaken next to me - not e'er
again. Your pillow, full of memories and
emptiness these days, feels cool. I long for
just another touch of warmth, and yet at least I find
that I can breathe just one more deeper breathe again,
in memory of all the loving times we shared.

At times an anger rises up, so swift it seems
as if it came and went within an instant; for now
I can forgive the many little things you used to do
that irritated me - so easily. I only wish it had
been so when you were here with me. I find
myself praying, to a God I never really knew
before. Yet now I must believe God to be real,
beyond the many images religions' seek to
cast upon the multitudes. For it seems somehow,
that She has come to me, to help me past this
point of your departure.

She comes to me in puffy clouds of white that
drift upon a clarity of blue so true I can't deny
that I appreciate this beauty. And it feels as if
somehow, an artists' touch had come to brush
this tapestry alive for me. I watch the autumn
sun just rise and fall; all thoughts of productivity
left elsewhere, at some others' door. And I know
that now, right now, I need to feel the flavor of
these moments - bittersweet and yet so full
of love...

? Michaelette ?

9/17/2001
Copyright© 2001 Michaelette L. Romano
All Rights Reserved
Take me home...