Forgetting to Remember

This place, this space, these walls, this paint -
have grown eerily disenchanting. Ghostly
images of inner suffering remain invisibly
intact to tell the tale. A scent of musty
memories still bleeds its way into mortality,
whispering of days that used to be.

Her memories are all that she has left,
scattered there amid the dusty clutter;
saved over a lifetime of ever needing
more of these - these things. Not knowing
how to love, e'en now - she tends to sit
and stare into a place that never really
was; fingering a figurine, imagining there
must have been a happy moment when
this gift had first arrived. Impossibly serene,
she settles in to just perceive one fleeting
moment when she felt herself as loved
and lovable.

Too few and far between, those memories.
Too quickly lost amid the give and take
of every day with him. A husband gained,
but even after loss of death, the anger lingers
on and on, disrupting these, her days of
all she thought it should have been. Where,
the happy ever after? When, the blossoming
of love into forever? Why this endless feeling
of disaster, waiting on the other side of every
living door?

The world fades away into a grayness
seeming more and more complete. And
so she drifts again into the mists of all
her make-believe; forgetting all the pain
her heart still holds; forgetting to remember
what they called reality. And here her
spirit dwells in joy forever...

? Michaelette ?

12/4/2001
Copyright© 2001 Michaelette L. Romano
All Rights Reserved
Take me home...