The Love Lies in Between

The art of seduction, turned into abuse.
Reclusive lair, computer screen.
A way to walk into their dreams,
yet never have to try to make them true.
Pornography is much more fun,
when they can find it, one on one.

Bitter emotions projected on high.
Smoke a joint and fly into the sky.
Part of that great industry
produced for entertainment.
Give them what they want,
no matter any stain it might produce.

Pick your part and play the game.
They never have to know your name.
Pretend you're someone you could never be.
The fantasy feels much more real than
those illusive dreams you can't quite keep
when you awake. The cyber world,
where your mistakes can simply be denied.

Hallucinate it, electronically.
Touch her hair, her face, her knee.
Then go in for the kill.
Will it - till she feels it too.
A pause can be construed as just a glitch.
No meaning there that might become
a hitch in that arousal.

Lead her on, and promise her the sun, the moon,
and every dream come true. Ejaculate,
and turn off your computer. More intimate
than any trip to Hooter's. Touching close,
the sizzle of erotic energy conveyed
across the distance in an instant.
Go to bed, and lay your head down
with your spouse. Stimulating sex can
be a double show tonight.

Tell yourself it really isn't cheating.
Convince yourself that nothing real
has changed. Show disdain each time
your spouse accuses you of doing something
that they can't define. And yet they know.
The signs are there, the afterglow.
The altered look within your eyes.
Intuition can be wise beyond compare.

A movement, just a touch, can tell so much.
Awkward then, when so much lies between.
Interactions thrown off-beat.
Thoughts of sweeter moments loom
within another state, another room.
Gloom begins to gather in a place
that used to feel like coming home.
A restlessness you can't throw off.
Images - they know that far off look within your eye.

Confusion mounts as time goes on.
How can it be that fantasy can seem
more real than life within the world?
Slow but sure, obsession enters in.
It feels so good to cheat and win.
Take another chance and let
your blood flow hot in yet another
great adventure then.

But you didn't realize your heart
was really opening. Levels within levels,
as you walk within the labyrinth, too real.
Deep, the waking dreams that you induced.
Freedom rings, and angels sing your name.
Your mind begins to open, and you flinch.
You thought you'd never have to move an inch.

And yet somehow, the longing takes you over.
To bring the dream into reality.
A marijuana high will loose
the greatest of restraints.
And you feel as if your soul were split in two.
At last, one day, you find a way
to take to flight for real.

Just open up the door and drive away.
Regardless of the pain you cause that day.
Pretend you are a knight upon a white
and gallant steed. Squeal your wheels
and leave them standing there. Without
a word that might explain the dare
you took, while wrestling the paradox
of feelings that awakened deep inside.

A month or two of bliss. A kiss that needs
to last eternally. You claimed you had it
in you to succeed at even this. It wasn't
very long before the fall began to spin
within your mind again. Here to there,
with nothing in between. Live the dream,
but keep your focus on the other half.
Reality is squandered on the sane.

It wasn't very long at all. Three months
and you were on the run again. Back to
the place where it had all begun. But now
the sun just doesn't seem to shine
the way it used to do. And nothing seems
quite clear. You drift through days within
a haze, wondering just how and why
reality was changed.

Your wife is distant and your kids
are looking at you with disdain.
It seems to rain so often there these days.
Coiled, tense - no sense of rest
can ease you into sleep. Your dreams
have run so far away, that when you wake,
you feel disoriented.

A love song, playing on the radio.
You're back there, in the afterglow.
Suddenly the light turns green, and
someone there is beating on their horn.
It almost seemed that you had been reborn.
Then logic and proprietary were thrown
into your face. And all that you could feel
was a disgrace.

You thought that going back would solve it all.
Weeks, and months, and years, and still the fall
is haunting every moment that you live.
You used to feel a joy in giving everything
to them. But now the joy brings pain you
can't reveal. Gnawing at you, far beyond
your will. The shame and guilt may never
go away. Past and present blend into
another endless day.

All the world feels surreal, and you are lost
within the corridors of those who always
wish for more. There is no satisfaction there.
No blissful sigh of knowing love lives on.
No one that holds your soul in gentle motion.
No hand that makes the fear all go away.
Trapped within a paper vow that never
goes away.

You rue the day you fell in love.
But you're still longing for that feel
of bliss again. Yet somehow still,
the love lies in between.
Beyond your grasp, until the last
of all your guilt is past...

? Michaelette ?

Copyright© 2002 Michaelette L. Romano
All Rights Reserved
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