Just Her and Him

Bloated belly, speaking of a pregnancy
that never came to term. One little worm
caught up and then suspended into
an unendingness of sorrow within her -
she never had to borrow any tears
in growing up or growing old with him.

Yet still, it seemed a tragic blow -
the gist of all this growing old.
As if her precious hopes and dreams
had all been blasted into scientific particles
and platitudes - somehow forever unredeemed.
Where once - she swore, she'd touched
the realms of all eternity within reality -
right here on earth in mortal form - oh now...

Now, the bloating seemed to be obscene,
and yet her only confidant within the days
that grew within his seeds of emptiness.
Where once, a trust and thus belief,
seemed to sustain her - now all she saw
and felt and knew - were just his lies
and alibis that cooled. Cool to cold to ice,
his methods of mechanical refrigeration.

It was as if her eyes had somehow
grown into the generations of her children.
Reason - yes - she still remembered
all the times back then, when
heart and soul found more than
reason in her children. But now,
her children, grown and gone somehow,
had left her all alone to face the emptiness
of all the space his passing left to her.

She'd never been that wise within the harsh
realities that men named history. The further
that she reached, it seemed, the walls just closed
in faster on the dreams she used to dream.
Power, glory, fame and recognition.
His path seemed carved of great perdition,
after all was said and done. The rising of
the sun could never quite reach to the heart
and soul of him.

The dawns had all grown dim within
the wedding bed that once had brought
them bliss as man and wife.
And she couldn't quite remember
the last time he'd kissed or held her
in a passionate embrace.

For it seemed, as time went on, that
he had delegated all the depth
of great emotion unto only her.
When was it that her life had turned
into no more than just his blur
of speed...? Was it back in college,
when their altered mind-sets seemed
to dream within a unity of drugs imbibed...?

Why was it that her life felt cold and dry now,
like his arms. Where now, the charms that
once upon a time he'd claimed his own...?
Smothered by his degradation -
life went on somehow. But where or why
would loving come from, now that he had
broken both their hearts into the bits
and pieces of another strategy...?

No. Something in them had grown wrong.
And all that they once claimed to love
was suffering, somehow, within their stead.
Mother, sister, daughter, wife -
father, brother, husband, son -
the differences were left unclaimed
in them. For they had never even tried
to understand the depths.

Relative was not a word in his vocabulary.
Rather, it brought visions of insanity.
His wanting, wishing - all turned in
to no more than an expectation.
Blaming some illusive "her" -
no more than just a fleeting image
in his battered mind. The love
within his heart left far behind,
for all too long.

Still, she went on.
Bloated belly, speaking of a pregnancy
that never came to term. One little worm
caught up and then suspended into
an unendingness of sorrow within her -
she never had to borrow any tears
in growing up or growing old with him.
But lately, she kept wondering
where all the meaning that she used to
feel had gone. And once again, her very
soul was pointing to relationship - the kind
that used to be just her and him...

? Michaelette ?

7/22/2003
Copyright© 2003 Michaelette L. Romano
All Rights Reserved
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