Back Into Them

Marriage as a financial transaction.
Cold and cruel, the numbers never feel.
Add, subtract, or multiply - the real
is found within experience.
Stuck within the ought-to-be's.
Ever trying to break free.

She realized that those who judged
must be judged in return.
For there, within their eyes
of condemnation, lay the lies
that they had based their
lives upon.

The fire burned.
Down deep inside.
No longer would she e'er abide
their scathing wit of worthless words.
Nor melt into the pain of realms
she'd left so long ago.

And so she scrolled through the environment
in search of meaning that would last beyond
a past of equilibrium gone wrong.
Long, it took, for her to realize
what lay within the shadows cast on her.

Hard, it reached into the core
of all that she'd lived for.
It took much time to grieve and
finally get beyond the feel of pain.
But at last, the healing kicked in again.

She had been living in a dream
that they preferred. A daydream
of a majesty that never quite occurred.
She finally realized it wasn't hers.
And then begin to slew off their projections.
Seeking yet again a new creation.

Even as the core reached up
and out into the world at large.
Her mind became engorged
with every truth that she'd
denied herself before.

There was a time of evermore.
Before the fire rose.
Toasting into ash, the fragrant rose.
But now her beauty was abhorred
by men who once adored
her every thought and move,
and feeling too. The intimate
would have its say, at last.

She had grown older - all alone.
'Twas then they thought to steal
the very hearth of home from her.
Scheming in the way of their disease.
Taunting, teasing, pushing, pulling -
harming her in ways still left untold.
It was worse than the obscenity
they'd built their lives upon.

And for a span of time, she felt forlorn.
Seeking and yet finding once again,
that strangers were more likely
to befriend her in her ardent times of need.
Her paramours had fled into the distance.
Cheating her of all that once was pleasant.
Lost in the complexities of marriage vows
that turned into no more than a transaction.

Cold and cruel, the numbers never feel.
Add, subtract, or multiply - the real
is found within experience.
The fire burned. The core arose.
It flew beyond excepted prose.
Defiantly, she squared her shoulders.
Sending all their pain back into them...

? Michaelette ?

2/24/2005
Copyright© 2005 Michaelette L. Romano
All Rights Reserved
Take me home . . .