You fell into a deep, dark chasm
that someone else created.
Unfamiliar with the monsters of their minds,
you fell - into a spell created long ago.
At first the falling felt like drifting.
Then you hit the bottom.
Hit it hard.
Head splitting while strange faces
came and stared at their reward.

With their façade of pre-planned normalcy
somehow they chipped and changed the form
of who you used to be.
Now known, the cause: their deep dishonesty.
It's like the growth of a disease.
Wanting so much to believe
your love could really make them better.
But soon or late, you realize
that time with them was never on your side.
Trying even harder
to believe your love would heal
the battering, abusive facts of life.

One-sided love.
They sucked it in
and never gave it back.
Running out of energy
as loving leaked away.
They turned it into nothing more
than one more high along the way
that led back to the emptiness
they liked to feel inside.
Down and deeper.
Hurting more and more.
The blame they laid upon you
keeps on pouring in the door.

It wasn't you.
The revelation that you didn't want to have.
You can't make love with someone
who finds joy in making you feel bad.
Despair around the edges
of the bubble that they blew.
The air is running out and so are you.
Can't save them when they want to stay that blue.
Can't love them when their loving isn't true.
You force yourself to stand and then
begins the longest, hardest road
that you have ever met.
The climb is hard.
It seems impossible.
Slipping down, they're on your back.
Pry off their arms. It all goes flat.

Their kinds of high
are never worth the lows.
But still somehow their deep, dark chasm glows
with eerie sounds escaping in the breeze.
Mysterious, the way they need to breed
expecting yet another victim's love.
The light is fading.
Dusk flows in.
The monsters of their minds grow thin.
You made it back to your own space.
Keep standing, for you have to face it -
right now, right there, right in the mirror.
All the things you said and did
before you manage to get clear.
A little spark of hope.
Hang on.
You'll make it through to a new dawn.
Alone, but free of being only someone else's pawn.
Remembering you had a life before it all went wrong.

The shock is wearing off.
The pain grows sharper.
Coming back to self -
like waking from an awful dream.
A little at a time.
Pain running down your spine.
Don't push too hard.
Be easy on yourself.
Now that you can be yourself again.
Wash within the cool, clear stream
of gentle warmth that comes
as your own loving is redeemed.
Wash away the feelings
that came at you in the dark.
It was but wasn't you.

Begin to feel this seeming quite impossible review.
Cling to all the good you tried to do.
And let yourself be lonely for a while.
Until, without a thought, you find your smile.
Still intact.
The love comes back
from unexpected places.
You were asleep.
Now you're awake.
And you can feel the living grace.
And yes, my dear, it really is for you...

? Michaelette ?