he tried so hard to busy himself
with other thoughts and things
to keep the fear at bay

until finally all his strength was spent
and magic powers eluded him
all that was left
was this image
upon which he feared to gaze

feminine in form and nature
illusive yet always present
the shadow of his death

and he slept
a long and dreamless sleep
as she prepared him
for his initiation

then, just when it seemed he would awaken
a dream formed out of the mists
and he dreamt
of days so long forgotten
when, in innocence
he drank the milk of life
and all he knew was her
his mother love

she was his forever
her gentle hands
her loving touch
and endless tomorrows
spent in the warmth of her arms

and in this instant of forever
lying safe within his mother's arms
he spied a misty image -
a shadow in the fog of unity

this image, could it be?
she lay one hand on each shoulder
of the keeper of his life
as if encouraging, supporting, nurturing
all that he loved best

and there, before his very eyes
this image
that he ran from for so long
in mist of spirit’s form
stepped forward

one step forward
and the blending began
one step forward
and the two became one

and all he could do was watch
in wonder and in awe
as this transcendence became reality

and in this instant of forever
suddenly he knew
the one he longed for
was the very image that he feared

birth and death
beginning and end
contained complete
within one pair of loving arms

and in this instant of forever
fear evaporated
or did it merely change its form and course
as it ran through the heart of his being

only then did he truly awaken
to the reality of all that is

for all that really is
is love

Michaelette
10/30/98