The Life of Time

I was married once
but it never really got beyond
the point of dress rehearsal
even with two children born
created as we played
our parts upon the stage of life
as we'd been taught to do

The years have come and gone
and the rehearsal ended long ago
Divorce, an end
that some say leads
to yet another new beginning

In some ways, they are right
and I've experienced a share
of the delight found in beginnings
yet more and more the endings
seem to rise within my mind
in image and in memory
at night when specters rise
to walk the living world once again

Now I live alone
for my children are grown
and live their lives apart from me
just as they really need to do
yet I'm the only parent
that they ever really knew
through years of all their growing pains

and in a sense, even this
this breaking away
from the roles that I played
has taught me how to grow
for children somehow see
the breaking points
before their parents manage
to imagine them full-grown

I have accepted this
and our relationship grows stronger
as do we
within the love
of this acceptance

yet still somehow
I can't break free
from this sense of incompletion
that comes from the deletion
of a role

or could it be the feel?
of the unendingness of all eternity
that plagues me now
rather than some vow
that was despoiled so many years ago

or loss of all the varied roles
that I had to learn to play
as I sought to teach and find a way
for us to stay together

How strange, that with age
and ages passing by
I would come to wonder why
yet once again

ah, but spring is here
and love is in the air
I breathe it in
and feel desire awaken
even as these memories
of love forsaken
seek to block its flow

It brings to me an inner glow
and then I know
I can't be more than seventeen
for the feel of love
remains the same
no matter how I change

I look into the mirror
but there is no stranger there
It's still just me
with perhaps a touch of gray
to add distinction

a wrinkle here, a smile there
yet still, I feel the energy
of love and life evolving
and still, my heart beats strong
longing for an other
that would share this love
entirely with me

and so you see
the dream of I
remains the same
even after years of pain
composed of just
too many endings

Within this thought
I feel a new beginning
start to form
for love is being born
yet once again

Love, the one true feeling
that keeps the planets wheeling
aligned within a cosmic order
flowing through the many borders
that mind seeks to impose

while the I of I remains
forever unrestrained
for love flows free
through all the life of time
and then through me . . .

?Michaelette?

5/16/2000
Copyright© 2000 Michaelette L. Romano
All Rights Reserved
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