Then You Went Away

My world was filled
with wonder and with love
through sultry dreaming
days and nights of you
when all I'd have to do
was close my eyes
to see the light of you
but then you went away

So hard to describe
those ways of your departure
One might say
you closed your heart
but truly was your heart
still there
just not for me

and yet again
that you chose to spend
your days within your mind
but seeking, still I find
intricate connections
of heart and mind and feeling
for we are each a whole
yet try as I might
I could not find a way
to free the love inside of you
to flow with mine again

Did you think then
that if you gave away
the very love that made me stay
I wouldn't give love back to you
even as I gave the love I knew
down to the core of who I am?
but your fear and then your anger
just infected everything
you passed it on
and then you went away

Where once you walked with me
on wings of winds eternity
now, no matter how I search the skies
your spirit, wise, is gone
and I wonder what you've done
to make it so
for I would know this much
before I die - why endless skies
weep tears of sorrow
streaming from tomorrows never come
and why you went away from me

You say you need to find yourself
yet self is what you've always been
Why now this strong defense
to keep me out?
No longer can I scream
for entrance there
because my voice was lost
within the course of crying so
but still I need to know
why is it that you chose to go
so far away?

I remember those sweet days
and nights of spring
when we shared just everything
within a loving interplay
A star was born
that shone so bright
the endless night
was filled with dawning light

Little did we need to sleep
instead, in silence, each would keep
our loving vigil
as god and goddess rose within
and made the worlds spin
in harmony with all the love we shared
but now you do not even care
to hear from me
while I and love's eternity
are left to feel your deep despair
for you're not here

and it seems that even now, somehow
you've come to think your destiny
lies within mind's will to be
what the world preaches to be right
even as your soul screams out in pain
within these nights
of your departure

yet when I questioned you
to try to find a reason why
this loving had to end
a shield would descend
as you whispered quietly
"I just don't know."

just as, it seems, you still don't know
the rage that builds withinyou
or the fear that spins
illusions of your guilt
that bring such pain
to every gain you seek

yet your fury never wins its say
and your fear is cast away
for you've spent your life
just keeping it at bay
and there you stay
away from life and love and me

I question why
but how can answers ever come
from one
who never knew . . . ?

?Michaelette?

12/7/99
Copyright© 1999 Michaelette L. Romano
All Rights Reserved
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